Complacency can be the murderer of success. When we get into a comfortable position in life we tend to stop working, stop growing, and just not have the hunger we once did. Unfortunately for us the world around us doesn't stop changing and while we are standing still it is moving forward. We keep doing the same things that once worked well for us hoping to replicate earlier success and it doesn't work anymore because we failed to adapt all of life's little changes. This isn't to say that persistence and consistency aren't keys to success in life they are but when you allow your growth to be a rigid dogma of ideas you stop growing. How do we avoid this complacency and experience a lifetime of being on top of our game instead of just a few good years? By opening ourselves up to new ideas.
Any given year you can find a musician that has a great run of success and then won't ever be heard in a meaningful way ever again. It may be because they got lucky with a hit song and not really have much talent but there are plenty of others who are damn good musicians that fail to maintain their stardom mostly because they fail to adapt to changing tastes. It's like the disco craze, how many artists' careers did that claim? You see when you have success in one field or method you tend to get associated with that and that may be fine for awhile but it isn't very good for growth. This boxing yourself in forces you into stagnation and makes your life very predictable and without challenges.
The thing is that our educational system usually does the job for us by program specialization. Too many people choose a major and then ride it out for their entire careers without making a change even when they are experiencing diminishing returns. About a year ago before I had any concrete idea of how I was going to get to where I wanted to go I went to my student advisory meeting to see what kind of schedule I could put together. I hadn't declared a major yet and when the councilor asked me what I was looking into I said History and Biology. You would have thought that I had told a joke because he actually kind of laughed at the idea. Sure the two subjects aren't very similar and it would have required lots of work on my part but the idea of pairing two distant things was comical to him. To me the idea was just a way of exploring different concepts and finding a way to weave them together like I had read about with Benjamin Franklin, Cicero, da Vinci,Goethe, etc. These men weren't great because they narrowed their field of study but precisely because they never stopped expanding it.
Each new thing that you try can keep pushing you into a new direction and open up further doors for you. You let your ideas become fluid and less tightly controlled. Of course you must maintain some semblance of control and focus to master the new ideas but new methods and ideas shouldn't threaten you they should excite you. If you've ever watched what passes for political discussion in this country you know exactly what I mean, the other side has no good ideas and everybody is too stubborn to be proven wrong or think in another way. It's no wonder that nothing really ever gets done and the things that do are often watered down and ineffective. Without experimentation it becomes very difficult to solve problems and chokes any type of growth you may have experienced, remember Success is Made Out of Lots of Failure.
Experimentation and learning moves us forward and allows for us to adapt to a changing world. By casting your net wide you never allow for complacency to set in because as soon as you meet your goal in one area you are immediately drawn to something else that you're passionate about, hence you never rest on your laurels. You could say that you would never be the best at anything if you spread out your interests and that very well may be true but the king of the mountain can only go down or stay on top. If you knowledge or skill set is very specialized and you're the best at it what happens to your growth? You must now spend all of your time defending your spot at the top and in the process may very well become obsolete due to changing times. The security you feel in your position is in all likelihood just an illusion and if you aren't prepared for a rapid change you can often just get left in the cold. Think about all of the people who spent years working one job and becoming damn good at it only to be fired one day and not be able to move on to something else. They lost their mobility and became too rigid and comfortable seemingly unaware of how precarious their lives had been the whole time.
Always keep in mind that if you're not improving you're ultimately declining. So shake off the idea that your livelihood is guaranteed if you just show up and go through the motions, the world doesn't stop and neither should you. Take the time to examine yourself and what you want to have happen in your life then go out and pursue it without fear. Complacency can set in slowly but it is always a real threat to everything that you worked to build before it. Don't let it get you.
With schools across the country about to start the fall semester the signal for back to school shopping has been sent out by the nation’s retailers. My classes start back up on Monday and I thought that it would be a good idea to produce a post on back to school fashion for college guys (if you're a freshman try reading this also: 5 Tips for College Freshman). Too many people brush the way the dress off as unimportant, I mean just look at the guys (and girls) who come to class in their pajamas. Like it or not how you dress will have a say in how people react to you in your day to day life. After all what is the first thing people notice before they ever speak to you? What you look like and if you spend your days walking around looking like a bum then you can expect it to have some effect at the way people view you as a person.
I actually just got back from the mall (sigh) and while I prefer online shopping I wanted to get some things that I could have during these first few days of classes and that required a precise fit. My main purpose was to hunt down the cardigan that I wanted and to add more basics to my wardrobe. That is what we are going to start with today the basics of what we wear. Too often we buy a great shirt(s) and keep pairing it with the same look until it gets too worn and faded. That’s wear these basics come into play, they help add versatility to your wardrobe and don’t always run you a lot of money.
Fitted tees: I’m talking about solid color tees here and most importantly white and black tees. They shouldn’t be included in every single look that you’re trying out but they are great when done right as stand alone pieces of clothing and for layering purposes. I don’t mean Hanes undershirts but more along the lines of the solid tees you would find at Gap. These shirts generally cost between 12-15 dollars a piece and I make sure that I have some in my closet.
Dress shirts: You don’t necessarily have to wear them like you’re going to a business meeting in fact they can look great casually. You should have at least two dress shirts to start but make sure these fit properly and have the right type of collar for the shape of your face, meaning try them on before you buy. For a really perfect fit you might consider having the shirts tailored so that all of the proportions are right.
Jeans: I’m not a fan of skinny jeans but then again you shouldn’t go baggy with your jeans either. Are you sensing a trend of having clothes that fit? You’ll want some with a darker wash and a pair with a lighter wash so you can pair them with different colored shirts. If you can afford the expensive designer jeans you should consider investing in a pair because there are some brands that are very high quality and durable. For the rest of us poor folk, Levi’s has some more in our price range that aren’t totally flimsy.
Pants: For many guys khaki’s are as far as they venture out to besides wearing jeans but a good pair of pants allows for more looks and are very comfortable. In addition to your khakis, pick up pairs of slacks in black, grey, and navy. These are all essentials to have because they often work better than jeans when paired with certain sweaters or coats plus those dress shirts we already talked about. A store like Dillards usually has some designer pants that you can get for fairly cheap. Today for instance I bought a pair of dark grey Calvin Klein’s for $35 because they were the last of my size and on the clearance rack. This isn’t the first time either, I’ve bought pairs marked down to $12 that weren’t any weird design or pattern they just needed to get rid of inventory. So check these clearance racks for your basic items like pants because some things that never go out of style get placed on there too not just horrid crap.
Belts: Have one brown and one black as a minimum.
Shoes: We should move beyond just wearing trainers, I know we’re in college but we need to have other options. First, we should have a white pair of shoes for our casual days something along the lines of an Adidas Stan Smiths or Nike Cortez. Boat shoes or drivers will work well with the pants we bought when we’re not trying to dress up, brown will work for most shades. Finally we need dress shoes and don’t go buy the plastic ones from Target either. Your dress shoes should be an investment in quality and despite the fact they won’t be in our day to day campus wear you should still own a pair.
Sweaters: It’s the middle of August now and hotter than hell but in 6-8 weeks it will be time to whip out the longer sleeves. A v-neck pullover is a good bet to have and also have a nice cardigan because you can use them for many different styles.
Socks: Get more than just the white athletic socks and pick up some nice dress socks in different colors.
The list of items shown above are always going to be in your wardrobe and will serve as your building blocks. Always add more of them to your collection but try different shades and styles to help branch out. The rest of the clothes you buy should exemplify your very own style which I cannot decide for you. Add different tops, pants, jewelry, and other accessories to complete the look that you’re going for.
When choosing the types of clothes you want to wear you need to take into account your body type and skin tone because certain cuts and colors will look like crap on you. For me red really does a disservice which sucks because I like the color but I know that other colors look much better on me. Here are two great articles to help you out, How to Find Your Perfect Colors and The Color Wheel: How to Combine Colors in Your Wardrobe. Also you should look through pictures of different styles that you like and mix and match items you find or maybe lift the style of some celebrity you enjoy ( I would recommend only using pieces that reflect who you are).
Beyond clothing another important aspect of fashion is grooming. You should always look the best that you can which means shaving, cutting your hair and nails, and just practicing all around good hygine.
Shaving
When it comes to shaving you can use a blade or an electric shave. I use a blade because it produces a closer shave. You can get fancy and have a whole shaving kit with brush and hot lather but I use only a good razor and some Nivea shaving foam. The trick to getting a really close shave is to lather once and shave with the grain and then re-lather and shave against the grain, thus getting the hair from both sides and leaving you baby soft.
Skin Care
I have a tendency to break out if I don’t shave for a couple days so I make sure to shave almost daily to help keep my skin clean. I wash my face using the Neutrogena Complete Acne Therapy system. It really helped my skin get way clearer than it had been previously. Yours may be different so if you have acne try different things and find what works for you. Also, with skin care make sure you use an after shave lotion with SPF 15 and that doesn’t clog pores to protect your skin and prevent blade irritation. The Neutrogena kit actually comes with it so if you buy that you’re covered. Get a body lotion as well especially for the winter months because your skin will get very dry. During one winter years ago I kept forgetting to go buy lotion and use it and my knuckles started to crack and bleed a bit from the cold. Yeah it hurt like hell.
Teeth
Floss your teeth everyday. Use a mouthwash like Listerine twice a day. Obviously brush your teeth. If you need whitening I suggest Crest 3D White toothpaste, I’ve used it for the past 6 weeks or so and my teeth look much whiter and it’s only $5 so buy it.
Scent
A good antiperspirant deodorant is a given to help you from stinking up everywhere you go but what else do you need? It starts in the shower. Find a scented bodywash or soap that you enjoy and do the same for shampoo. Take a shower daily which I don’t think I should have to say but well I can tell people don’t do it. During the summer months I use baby powder to help keep me dry and smelling good and then in the winter switch to lotion. When choosing a cologne try out many different scents to see which one you like and try not to buy one that’s too overpowering. Speaking of which don’t make a cologne overpowering by spraying it all over, 3 sprays max (and that may be too much for some scents). I own the following colognes, YSL Body Kouros, Burberry London, YSL Opium, and Adidas Moves 0:01 which I hardly ever wear. The Kouros is a favorite of mine and I don’t know how to describe its scent properly but it’s delightful. London is more of a rugged/woody smell, and Opium has an Asian spice to it and settles down into hints of vanilla.
Well that’s going to do it for my back to school fashion extravaganza. Try to always keep in mind that your clothes should be a reflection of who you are and who you want other people to see you as. If you’re still totally clueless remember to keep it simple and stick to the basics, having clothes that fit and the right colors for your skin tone will put you ahead of most of the pack. Keep searching online and pick up books on fashion to help move you into a space where you can make the right fashion decisions on a daily basis and have a wardrobe you can be proud of.
